APOLOGIES.

IF I'M FAST I might finish before we're gonna watch a movie. GOTTABEFAST.

Aaarharhar. I often have this feeling that I'm not .. worthy of speaking to some people. Like I'm probably not good enough for them as company. Like like. I often get this feeling when people are down and I'm like oh my god let me hug you and tell you shit's gon be oka- no wait I can't talk to you, you're way too cool. :'C
Cause I mean blerr I'm just a annoying teenager who probably doesn't understand shit and uh oh. Yeh. Why and how or what could I ever do to help someone I mean they probably ahve shitloadsa more experience so what would my tiny bitsy itsy thoughts help them since they probably already have thought that way and shiiet. bra.

Then also uh oh. What was I gonna say. oh my god I've been thinking so much today but now I can't remember bahuu. Well uh, apparebtly people often.. or well, not people. It's just that always when I speak of people, others seems to think they're the devil themselves. I mean the people I'm talking about, not the people I'm talking to. Since I pretty much never speak good of people, I mean. I never mention people when I'm happy about something they've done or been or whatever you know, the only times I mention people is when I'm angry, annoyed, angsty whatever negative feelings, and so ofc I will express myself about the people I'm talking about in a negative way so that people who hear me talkign will think that oh my god that person must be such a bitch! And this happens actually quite a lot.
BUT it's not that way. JUST BECAUSE I happen to be pissed at some one at the moment, doesn't mean they're the devil themselves. It doesn't mean they're fucking evil and have plans to rape and kill me. IT DOESN'T MEAN they're bad people, SRSLY GAIS. Everyone I know are good people in their own way (okayIknowaboutonethat'snotbutit'snotrelevant...) and I don't really HATE anyone just because I happen to be expressing my negative feelings about them at the moment to you. I'm just normally angry, or depressed or whatever over something going on around this person or w/e shit m'kay.
So yeah. Now you know. THE MORE YOU KNOW.

Ugh. And I really feel like I need to apologize to pretty much everyone in my past ohmygodI'vebeensuchacunt, tho I have no idea if I have changed at all ahahaha.. aha.. well anyway been treating people like shit and uh oh. NOTHING NEW. Na but yea... And there's this one person who actually uh oh, I think he had .. okay no actually I know he had a crush on me but denied it SO MUCH, causeimacunt since I was afraid of getting togetehr and i know it was wrong to just act as if I didn't get it even tho he did tell me and all but uh oh aaa sorry. And and.uh. It kinda bothers me since I have no idea what kind of a crush it was and I'm so afraid that he'd still be in pain of it and uh oh. I'm sorry. You probably know who you are so uh. sorry.

Okay well I'll go watch a movie nao with ma mama and ma sistaaa. YE.
- Niko