Euthanasia

... I need something new to write about. Ideas? Anyone?

What would you gais like me to write bout? Help me out please. ö__ö

Uh. For today then.. I haven't been doing much today. preparing mentally for mom and dad leaving tomorrow, they're going to Thailand. For more than one week. This house, is doomed. I don't think there even will be a house left when they come home, ahahah. No, but srsly.
So yeah, I'll be the one in charge of everything (HNNG) for sometime and it doesn't sound fun at all. I can just imagine all the stress, taking care of me AND my sister. And my dog. And my cats. And the house. DAMN THEM ALL! They're all over 10 years (in human years) BUT STILL CAN'T TAKWE CARE OF THEMSELVES PPFTT ttssshh HOUSE, y u no clean yourself!? DOG, y u no walk yourself!? Ahaha.

Uhm. My back is hurting. And it's cause i sit bad ahaha, and I'm not sitting in my right now making it even worse, noooo. I would neveeer! I'm so mean :'v
Oooh, here's a pic I'm working on (again, finally) and aaaahhh it's so much fun, too bad I have been way too tired today to continue it but whaatev. I think I'll be all alone almost all weekend so aaahhhhh own time, haven't had that for a loong time and it's gonna be so nice, quiet and peaceful and aahh. I love own time.

There was something else I was supposed to say but.. I can't remember. FUCK YEAH GREAT MEMORY. I feel like a.. turtle.

I should go to sleep. So that I can be creative and not snål tomorrow. aawwyyeah. Yeah on the catwalk. baby.

- Niko

SEVEN DAYS

ararara, I'm sorry I haven't made an interesting update for a looong time nao andand. I'm just out of everything.

I just feel really busy all the time tho I'm never really doing anything.. wwwhhaat. I suddenly have a life.. ö__ö

And I'm srsly getting tired of that goddamn list, so I'm just gonna post an answer to every topic that's left, 7 days that is, muehehe. And yeah. Give you guys something to read. maybe post some pics. I still haven't gotten my comp back so yyeah. i don't really have many pics, but I could import some pics from my cam, JUST FOR YOU. might do that.

Day 24 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.

I can't really choose a favorite movie, but I can.. pick a few ones that I like and uh uh. I dunno. You know, they keep changing cause you watch new movies all the time and yeah. uuuh. 

Where the Wild Things Are - I just love this movie cause it's so cute and .. I really like the soundtracks :''3 It's about this boy, who runs away from home cause he gets into an argument with his mom. He fins a boat and travels with it to an island where there are these big.. "monsters" that have their own problems and stuff, I can't really explain what it's.. actually about, cause I have no idea *dumbass* but it's really pretty and yeah.

Tokyo Gore Police etc. - AHAHA yes I am serious. I actually liek the Japanese B movies a lot, cause. most of them are just pure awesomeness :'D And Tokyo Gore Police was one of my first ones so, that's why i chose it. I also like The Machine Girl and.. other crappy movie ahaha. I'm not even gonna tell you guys what it's about cause.. yyeeah. just watch it. XD

Marie Antoinette - I have.. no idea if I wrote it wrong but whatever, awesome movie, awesome music, awesome everything.

Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Uuh.... Probably a lot of artist and .. talented people. They fascinate me, but at the same time, they make me so jealous I just want to.. explode. Sometimes I find peoples personalities fascinating too but yeah. A lot of simple things fascinate me to uh. yeah.

Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
I'm kind of.. superficial, so really a person that attracts me could just be a really nice looking person, but they ofc have to be nice looking in my eyes but uh yeah. Often I don't come around to think of their personalities and stuff until like.. I've known them for years ahaha, srsly. I'm kind of cold :'v But yeah. A person I find interesting or nice looking or anything that catches my eye that is them on the outside attracts me.. Do I make sense?

Day 27 - A problem that you have had.

.. A problem I have had. I have had a lot of problems. Like probably everyone else too, I mean. a problem you've had could mean.. you didn't finish your homework or.. you didn't have time to go out with the dog or... anything really but uh. a problem that I've had, and still have, is not being happy with myself. I'm like.. never good enough and.. stuff like that. I'm never pretty enough, or smart enough, or lucky enough. And, i suppose that's kind of a problem, cause it can make me really down. For example if I've been eating a lot and I imagine my legs being much fatter than the day before, that becomes a huge issue for me and I feel HORRIBLE. I can just be down all day and hate myself, and eat more and my problem just gets worse and uh yeah.

Day 28 - Something that you miss.
I miss summer. I miss the years I have wasted, when I could've done something. I miss.. being a child. Not needing to worry about the future, or decide what you're gonna study and what you're gonna start working with. I miss the inspiration I had when I was younger. I miss my self confidence that I once had. I miss not liking cosplay and cons as much as before. I miss being me.

Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
.. None. Which is more than just sad. It's.. Not good at all. dtwfhjlak 

Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month.
uuuh. I can't really figure anything out. it's just been.. nothing special. Feels like the past 3 weeks have all been the same kind of... something. Something same.

ANS THERE. Done. MUEHE. wonderful. Now I want to do something awesome.
And oh my god I love zodiacs cause, sometimes they make you realize stuff and.. They might change stuff and make you think happier.
- Niko

PENIS ENLARGEMENT

ahahaha today I got my first penis enlargement email, I feel cool. And I shouldn't actually be on the internet, but I still am. And Agnes Obel is amazing. once again.

Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.
Srsly, I don't really know many guys who are famous that I find attractive. maybe like.. Johnny Depp or someshit but that's like it. I just don't.. see a lot of famous guys ahahaha :'D

I don't have anything to really say, i just feel like I need to fucking update for once. On last friday I went to buy some pants, and I came back with a pair of purple pants, blue ones, normal ones and black ones + a white.. sweater.. ?? something. aanndduuh. Yesterday I bought tickets for Dance of the vampires, which I'm gonna go watch with Jenni, yaaay~ Uuum.. I haven't done much besides that. I've been watching TV and that's it.
I feel even more inspired to get money and buy a PS3 than even before.. AND DO OTHER STUFF I feel so.. fhuakj wants to do everything but right now I srsly have to finish that Egypt thing THAT I DIDN'T WORK ON YESTERDAY OR THE WEEKEND. *angryface at myself* gah, i'm so hopeless.
Anyway so yeah. uh. I suppose that's that for now. It's interesting how I always want to do so many other things when i ahve something I have to do.. Why can't I find the inspiration without stress? THERE MUST BE A WAY!
- Niko

Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?

Oh yeah, now you suddenly just write in your blog after abandoning all your wonderful readers for forever. yeah, you think you can just.. WALK IN and do that? Yeah? YEAH?
Actually yes, I think I can do that~ MY BLOG AFTER ALL, MUEHEHE
Okay, admittedly, it was a bit mean to tell you why I haven't been around, but the reason is, like I said in my last entry, my computer had been fucking around so I put it on fixing, and it's not done yet, but I've been borrow Valter's comp, with limited internet access not to waste my time. But this morning I feel I have the right to waste some time on my blog cause my bloggu is rabu rabu. Ahaha, what.
Listening to some reeeally random and shitty k-pop atm.. wtf even is this. Ugh.
I had this really annoyingly scary dream last night, woke up 2:30 hoping it to be 6am instead, cause then I could've gotten up but no, i had to go back to sleep with all the creepy shit going on in my head. I noticed my mom was still awake so I went to sleep with her, that's how fucked up i was in the middle of the night. Before I fell asleep I also cried. SRSLY. My god I hate horror movies from now on ;;__;; The dream in it self was kind of stupid but ofc I had to be really like.. daring or whatever, so i totally challenged all the bad spirits and ghosts and monsters and and. yeah, so the dream pretty much ended like.. i had just gotten home and my mom was cleaning and my dog was like lying but it looked like someone was moving her around. My mom said that it was normal, she was walking around by her self, but I insisted that there was definitely something wrong and tried to hold my dog AND OMGF iehusbik That feeling when I was holding her. IT WAS SO REAL. You know if you ever tried holding someone when someone else tries to pull them away? Okay well yeah. And then i tried to pull her loose from the spirit, ghost, demon whatevers grip and ofc it's becomes really angry, or so I think. This is the part where I wake up. SO RIGHT THEN, I WAS IN DEEP FUCKING SHIT cause every fucking monster ever existed HATES ME so bad they just want to fucking rip my brains out. That's what haunting me. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. Okay well yeah. I tried to think of calm shit but they invaded everything I though of and I was so scared someone would pull me out of my bed, or I'd hear some steps or Aserdtgfhuef SHITT i'm flipping right now and ohmygod my cat scared me Fdtyaguiefhojggghh goooooddd. i'll just okay quit thinking..
It's very beautiful outside atm.. I like that~

Okay, let's answer todays queestiooneee~
Um.. i have changed in many ways I suppose? I have probably become less selfish. And more flipped and fucked in the head ahaha. I have definitely become smarter and.. prettier. I have thinner legs, which I fucking looove. I'm a better drawer, tho I still want tgo improve. LOTSOO. Um, well ofc I have ages, and I've gotten new friends and changed schools~ I have definitely also become a whole lots weirder, and I think I might.. laugh more than I used to? I also have more of a life than I used to! Stuff that hasn't changed tho is the fact that i'm still as stressed as before, I NEVER LEARN TO ACTUALLY DO STUFF :''DD fff. Okay but I think I'm handling it better than before? I haven't flipped or started crying yet ahaha. okay that's prolly cause it's not as strict in my new school as it was in my old one.. FFFUUU-. Yes I have indeed also become a bad student .'c Skipping classes and shit,yoyo. ahaha well not really but yeah, we're so.. loose in my new school. It's fucking maaad.

Oh. I think I'm done! Fuck yeah, now I'll maybe try to write some more on my essay before going to school~ OOH and I finished this comic, I want to show it to you already all though it's not the official version cause I had to take a pic with my cam cause I don't have my computer and I have the scanner stuff installed on it but not this one so yyeah. But yeah, here you go~ BASED ON TRUE HAPPENINGS nyahahaha~

Okay peace out gaiis, have a nice day and a night without nightmares~

- Niko