ORELIUM ♥: October 2013

I think I'll just ramble for a bit. I feel I need to write something here before I go to bed, and so that's what I'm doing.

Ugh. I feel extremely tired right now. At the same time feeling tired feels.. comforting. The knowledge of being able to fall into nothingness right at the moment when you let it happen.. feels good. Like you know, not needing to struggle to fall asleep, but being death tired to begin with so you need only close your eyes and you'll be soundly asleep.

I wish I could be tired all the time, maybe even sickly tired, just fall asleep whenever. Haha.

Also it reminds me of the past, not in a bad way tho, at least it doesn't feel bad at this moment, probably does feel at any other time, but it's the feeling of gaming and all nighters. Late nights, and early mornings. Pumping energy drinks and watching the sun set, then rise. It's that dead, zombie feeling in my eyes, the way your eyes feel like when they've been staring at that screen for all day (or night). Feels quite good right now.

And the feeling of not giving a damn about anything cause your head is so tired, it doesn't want to process any deeper thoughts than "ZZzZzZzzzZZzZzz". aw ye.

I got about half of the things I wanted to do today done. I also got up about 2h later than planned, you think that might've been a part of all this failing?? Not even gon 'xcuse ma english yo.

Aahahaha I use Orelium for everything, I shouldn't but I just love it cause it's mine. It's my own little baby and creation, and only I know it's true meaning. No such thing as Orelium even exists for other people, for me it really is something. For me, it's important. And I want it to be me, just like Niko is me. I don't want to have to separate it from anything just because it'd have to be something else. Hahahahaha and no one knows what I'm talking about but that's fine, it's just the way it was supposed to be.

Okay one last pic and I'm off to bed. My thought are with you, anew.